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Mother-Daughter Dates, Dances and all the complicated things...

So, as I'm sure everyone can see from my tweets, posts, IGs and Snaps life is pretty great so far with our pretty princess. She has been through it in her short number of years and is unbelievably well adjusted - in most ways.
She is HILARIOUS, polite (most of the time), gets great grades and works hard at school. She's a "joiner" and in a TON of after school activities. She wants to take AP classes and is college focused. Her head is on straight and she has great thoughts about not dating until after high school (praise the Lord!) and is a strong anti-drug advocate (YAY! ASAP Ambassador on the way!)
She was STUNNING going to her school formal - with a group of friends - and asked me to take them all out after... because I'm the COOL MOM! #DreamsComeTrue #TheyStillMadeMeSitAtTheBar

However great things are going... her history has made it really hard to form normal bonds with us. This has caused some extra stress. This time of year especially can be hard.
When you think about a kid in care, it's easy to remember that they don't have parents around... but what's not easy is to remember that they are bonded (even if they know they are unhealthy for them) to their birth parents. Ryan and I desperately want to be her parents... but even after adoption we won't be.
Kid's in care don't want to go to a father-daughter dance... even if they love their foster dad. It's a betrayal. They don't want mother-daughter dates... even if they love their foster mom. While we do have fun days and go out on "dates" it's a constant battle to remember that even though in my heart I'm her mom... in her mind I can never be.

It's hurtful. It's sad. But she's amazing. We are blessed to have her in our lives. Her quirky, funny, sassy and adorable self.

More soon...

xoxo

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