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What does it mean to be a mom...

Here's the thing. And some of you won't love this... and some of you will think that my situation is different or haven't been a mom long enough or whatever... but...

My daughter will never be my best friend. My mom will never be mine.

I love hanging out with my mom. She's the best mother that has ever walked the earth. She's amazing in every single way and I can talk to her about almost anything. She's always got my back and we have a genuinely good time together. Still, she's not my best friend. My mom will always be my mom so she can say things to me that absolutely nobody anywhere ever can say to me. My relationship with her is so much deeper and profound than a best friend. I'm made from her DNA. She created my life with her own body. She's my mother.

My daughter is hilarious and fun. We have an awesome time together. She talks to me about a lot of things. We are comfortable. She trusts me. I will always be her mom and she will always be my daughter. There are things I need to protect her from - especially as a teenager. She doesn't need to know when someone pisses me off. She doesn't need to know if Ryan and I aren't getting along that day. That's the way it should always be - I will be her rock.

A mother-daughter relationship is not a reciprocal relationship the same way a best friend relationship is. 

I'm 35 now so, yes, I have seen my mom cry and she has confided in me things she wouldn't have when I was 13 or 18 or even in my 20's. But she is still my rock. She's still my mom. She will still protect me at all costs.

My child is 15 and I battle with wanting to be a cool mom. And I kind of think that any mom who says she doesn't is a liar (or maybe a one off). There are times that I would rather be her bestie. I want to gossip, drink fancy coffee and go shop rather than enforce consequences or tell her things she doesn't want to hear. We do still do all those fun things... but each moment that we spend together is an amazing opportunity to empower her, stretch her, teach her and set an example for what it means to be a Godly woman.

It's too easy to fall into the trap of wanting to be friends and buddies with our kids and lose the awesome responsibility we have been entrusted with. So, go forth into the trenches moms! Fight the good fight!

And I'm here with a Gin and Tonic when your teenager yells that she hates you...


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